Looking back to 2012 and Moving forward to 2013!

3 days left before 2013!!

Happy New Year to all in advance!!

I figure it's about time for me to review/recap everything that has happened and is still happening in my life before this year end to see & reflect what I can do to improve my life the coming year. I haven't totally processed the whole experience but I can say that 2012 has been a bittersweet year for me. It is this year that I've cried and hurt a lot but at the same time became fully aware of what really matters in life afterall the things I've gone through the past few months.

Though, 2012 welcomed me with a terible start-- from our unexpected separation that leads to the cancellation of our church wedding, betrayal of some people I've put my 100% love & trust and witnessing a death of a friend and uncle-- all these have taught me several important & positive realizations:

1. That God is always in control. I realized, I've over-planned, over-organized  & over-think of my life but no matter how long I plan & work hard to get it.. if it wasn't God 's will.. it will never happen. And so, I've learned to surrender everything to God & trust that all things happen for a reason & a purpose.

2. Money can't buy you happiness. I've heard it many times but it is this year that I've realized the true essence of this old saying. While it is true that money can buy you expensive car, mansion, branded shoes, clothes, bags and etc that can make you live your life comfortably & be temporary happy but it can never ever buy you the lost trust, pure love, real friendship, time that's been wasted, contentment, life that has been taken away by God, respect & peace of mind.

3. What death have taught me. During the time that I was still grieving &  completely shattered over our separation & cancelled wedding, I thought I was the most miserable and pitiful person in the whole wide world until 3 weeks after our split, another sad news came in.. My cousin's boyfriend of 3 years died in an accident. And as I witnessed how the family & my cousin mourn of their loss, I can't help but be ashamed of myself ... Who am I to question God for my misery when other people are even experiencing a more painful, almost unbearable trials? I am just dealing with my brokenheart and they're dealing with a loved-ones death? My situation is just nothing compare to theirs, right?

 .....

Rendell's death taught me a lot of life-lessons-- that we should always appreciate the simple joys in life.. that in the end a good life is not about how much recognitions & money you earned but the quality of relationship you leave to the people who are closest to you.. that we should always get the most out of your life because you will never know when will your life be taken away from you.

And eventhough Rendell died young but for me, he lived a very full life because of the values he lived by. :))

4. We all experience sufferings. My antie almost got everything.. a happy marriage, blessed with 2 beautiful daughters, a successful career and a comfortable life.. she seems to have everything. Until October 2011, her husband was diagnosed with a gallbladder cancer stage IV and was given a short-time frame to live. After a year of battling...my uncle died July this year.

 Like Rendell's death, Tito Jake's passing have also taught me a lot in life.. that true love still exists.. that in time, you will find someone who will love you till death do us part like they did.. that all people in this world (whether rich or poor,  famous or unknown) experience sufferings and that no matter how difficult it may seem.. life must still go on and we should able to accept it...

5. Learn to forgive. Forgiving the people who have hurt me is something that I'm trying to learn these days.  I believe that forgiveness doesnt happen on its own, you must choose to forgive. I wish I could say that I have completely forgiven them , but I'm not. I'm a work in progress and still have a long way to go. In the same way, I also have forgiven myself for my actions as well. I know I have done & said things that caused pain to others. I believe by continuously doing so would help me to ultimately move on in my life & be happy :))

.....

Anyway, I would like to end this post by summarizing the good things that has happened to me this year:

1. I was able to survive a heart ache! :)

2. I was able to land a job.

3. Had a wonderful 21st Birthday Celebration

4. Was able to close deals with my AXA Business

5. Meet and gained more friends.

6. Became even closer to God & family

7. Was able to finally see Lee Min Ho in person :))

8. Attended for the first time several company christmas parties :)

9. Found someone that inspires me :)

10. and became a better version of myself

Here's my latest picture taken at our Christmas party almost a couple of weeks ago..

I know, I know nakakasawa muka ko. lol. :))

I apologize if you find this post so random. hehehe~~

Till next year everyone! (｡◕‿◕｡)

Happy 2013~~

xxx

Always,

Rica ♡